I do what I want to do, bitch.

Now that winter break is coming to an end.. I can say that it had its ups and downs. There was surely a lot of me time: as in doing things that I wanted to do. From damn good partying to working at the Elephant Bar&Restaurant, from shopping EVERY SINGLE DAY (no lie) to being with good company, and from going to the gym to doing my favorite past time: COUCH-POTATO-ing IT. I'd say that I got a lot accomplished. I did what I wanted to do.

With the auspicious, there was the evils. DUIs, fights with best friends, fights with parents, paramedics and emergency rooms. In the words of a closer growing friend, "not so good."

I always have to learn the hard way

I have never experienced a feeling like this before..

There's definitely been many times that I've felt happy beyond belief, sad to the point where my heart ached, so angry that I.. that I... well I usually just keep everything contained.. but I have never felt scared my life. scared.

My mom is right, I always have to learn the hard way.

Come back home

I miss you.



I can't help but feel terribly childish about my underlying emotions. I'm living everyday in a silly, pretend fantasy that has a .00001% chance of ending happily ever after. Someday, I'm going to look back at all of this and laugh about how naive I'm being.

So even though I KNOW I'm being extremely foolish, why do I still keep trying to hold on?

When people run in circles, its a very, very mad world

Today, I was mad. Mad about everything that I've kept bottled inside without realizing it.

So I ran. Ran with the ability I never knew I had. Even though this doesn't make everything completely better, it definitely doesn't make me feel any worse than scarfing down 1500 calories of cheesecake.

Oh yes, and today, I blogged. One good change of events can definitely lead to a series of good events.